Friday 30 September 2011

Being Strong

Strength is a funny thing. All of us have the capability to be strong. When the going gets tough to find that inner courage to get you through the difficulties. The intelligence, creativity, inspiration, emotional upholding and general "Never quit" attitude that when you come out the other side makes you feel proud and alive and fulfilled.

But what about the strength to be weak? To admit when you need help? To ask for it? To say "I cant do this alone"?

Because admitting you need help is a whole other kind of strength. To put your faith and hope on someone else's shoulders and let them carry you, trusting that they wont drop you and help you through it.

What about when you don't have that person to turn to? Or when they (for whatever reason) arn't strong enough to help you.

What about when you stand screaming for help and they still don't realise how badly you need them? When they feel that you blame them for everything going wrong when really you just need something to blame and you wish they would ignore the yelling and see the pain going on inside.

Then what when they cant/wont help you? Admit that you need help but dont have anyone around? Or try and re-find that inner strength to keep going as you did before? Will that make you stronger in the long run or eventually lead to the cracks turning into fractures and completely tearing you apart?

What if after being strong for SO long, you don't know how to just let it go?

How do you find a different way to tell someone you need help, you need them, and your not as strong as they think you are when that's exactly how you told them and they still dont hear it?

And how many days can you call in sick to work to try and find a way to deal with it without getting fired?