Damn the man!

So I've been thinking about jobs, working and careers. With all this thinking of options about me moving here, Codaniel moving to the UK etcetc I've thought a fair amount about what I would do if I move here.

Especially if I'm on a J1 Visa it would probably be something pretty standard. Retail or hospitality or something. Not that there is anything wrong with that in the slightest I was just thinking.

Since I was tiny all I could think was I wanted to be an actress. I wouldnt even consider any other career option. Until I was about 18 and I started thinking "Hmmm. Is this really what I want to do?" And I have no regrets about that being the only thing I'd been working towards my whole life.  I figured "Hey I'm 18 - I'll work out what I want to do"


So then I kind of fell into Fundraising (as most fundraisers do!) and worked really hard for the last 5 years to create a career of it. And I didnt really get very far. Someone I used to intern with is now a manager at a major charity, running one of the biggest events in the UK. And dont get me wrong I dont resent anyone else but it makes me sad that I didnt achieve anything anywhere near to that.


So on the one hand I want all I've ever wanted work wise, which is to succeed and  be talented and skilled in an area I enjoy.

But on the other hand I strongly believe in the philosophy "You work to live not live to work" Why should I be a slave to the man, working extra hours and stressing myself out to achieve a  "career" when I could work just as hard at a standard job that I can leave behind when I get home at the end of the day to spend time with my loved ones?


I dont know....maybe I shouldn't worry too much. Everything happens for a reason and I'm sure it'll all work out. I hope!

The monster :)

Hehe, so funny anecdote of the night.


Me and Seth were going to pick up Codaniel and Kaylin from work.


I wanted to come because "I won't pass up the opportunity to be out on a full moon"


then I thought maybe I'm not a vampire, but a werewolf.

(in case you didn't know I have very pronounced vampire teeth which grew naturally. People used to mock me at school so I totally took ownership of it to freak people out!)


chatting about werewolf vs vampire and which I am etc and then we turned on the radio and guess what came on? 3 Days Grace - Animal I have become.


Awesome huh?! Hehe well I thought it was cool.


That's my story of the day for ya! :D

And in case you dont know what song I'm talking about - here it is in all its glory!

Long distance woes

Sooooo being here for 3 months gives me a lot to think about. Mainly about how exactly I'm going to cope when I leave again.


It was hard last time, I'd spent 8 days with him. This time we've been living together, building a life together for 3 months. And it's been amazing. We've really found our rythm as a couple (No TWSS's please!), seen what it would be like if we had our own space together, we have a baby (kitten! :-P) together, I could see myself living and working here. 


How can I say Goodbye to that?

We were thinking that if I find a decent job (or two 1/2 decent jobs!) when I get back then I could proabably come back for 3 months again Jan-March. Then we would be together for our anniversary, valentines day and my birthday. But how are we going to cope in the 4 months in between? Over Christmas and New Year too. I can't even begin to think about how hard it will be - its too heartbreaking.


I also spoke to a visa advice person, y'know just to find out about options.

J1 Intership Visa - Possibility but not permanent and has umpteen rules and regulations about it
Work Visa - Nigh on impossible. Don't even bother
Fiance/Marriage Visa - Takes at least 8-12 months to process


8-12 months?! Not that we were thinking about that in a huge frame of mind just yet but seriously- A YEAR?!

*Sigh* this is horrible. I hate it. I try to stay positive and look at the options available to us, to know everything WILL be ok...but its so hard when we think about the time we will have to spend apart.


I just wish the answer would come to me. If anyone has any ideas or suggestions please feel free to pass them on!

Love is...

Ok. I'm intrigued because I feel there is no conclusive evidence on the subject. 

I want your definitions of love. Is it definable? 

How do you know when your in love? Is it a feeling? Or is it the just 'knowing'?

Do you always expect it to be "butterflies and candy hearts" or can you tell when its developed into something deeper and stronger?

Is it the reasons you can count or the ones you cant?

I'll be intrigued to read responses and then post my views on it. (Sorry to play devils advoate a bit on that!)

By the way even if your not a frequent reader of follower and just happened to have stumbled across my blog please do feel free to comment - annonomously if you want. (Same goes for regular readers - feel free to comment autonomously)

I really am interested in hearing as many views on this as possible.

Cheers guys :D

PS: Jaspers Contribution. He was very intrigued by the typing!

gjvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvggggggggg,m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Giving do we think maybe?